Guest Post written by Hayley Jackson
Sometimes I have a lot of pride as a parent.
After all, I do all of the good things expected of a Christian homemaker!
I breastfeed for as many months as the baby wants. I stay home with them. Cloth diapers. Homemade everything. Homeschooling. No electronics. Always outside. They eat healthy everything. They get a lot of structure and discipline.
I think to myself, “I’m sooo good at this!”
And then I have a day where my three-year-old won’t listen to anything I say.
I get angry; I want her to know I’m angry, so I don’t smile at her when she gets out of bed at naptime for the 5th time. “If nobody naps, I won’t be able to get all of those chores done that I wanted,” I think to myself.
And then I say something that I never wanted to say to one of my children. In a firm whisper, I tell her to shut up so she wouldn’t wake her brother up from his nap.
I was mean.
And then I realize–I’m actually not any good at this.
I’m graceless at moments. I’m selfish.
I’m an idiot who happens to listen to God’s wisdom some of the time, and only then do I see good results.
When I idolize my own “good choices,” that’s when I fail.
All of those homemade meals, all of that laundry hung up on the clothesline, all of the canned garden beans, all of the made beds, all of the homeschool books–none of it is worth anything if I do it to make myself feel good, accomplished, or worthy of some Best Homemaker Ever prize.
Those things should be services for my family, flowing from the river of Christ’s love inside of me.
A river that never dries up enough for the jagged rocks of mean-spirited words and actions to rear their heads.
It is a telling thing to find home keeping to be so important that those chores of the home get emphasized over dealing kindly and Godly with my children, even in their moments of disobedience.
It is telling.
It tells that my heart that day, and, honestly, several days before also, was not right with the Lord.
I was not fulfilling my God-given role of mother and teacher to my children; I was instead fulfilling my self-given role of Homemaker Extraordinaire.
God promises to abide in us if we abide in Him.
“Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me.” ~John 15:4.
If I am being a self-centered person in a moment, in a day, it’s not because God didn’t hold up His end of the bargain; I didn’t hold up mine. I didn’t abide in Him. I let the rest of life creep in.
Thankfully God is quick to forgive
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” ~ 1 John 1:9
and gives wisdom to those who seek it.
“If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.” ~James 1:5
So if you’re like me, sometimes lost in your own idols, whatever they may be, go back to abiding in God with me.
Do you recognize any idols in your heart?
Are you willing to sacrifice all to God to fulfill the true calling He
has on your life?
God’s blessings to all.
Guest Post written by Hayley Jackson:
I am Hayley Jackson, 26-year old wife to Cory, mother to three under
three. I am determined and desperate to know more of Christ’s love.
I’m an old-fashioned person in love with the life of simplicity.